How to accept a gift wrapped in garbage

How to accept a gift wrapped in garbage

“Many are the plans in a persons heart, but it is the lords purpose that prevails.” (Proverbs 19:21)

Acceptance is the action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered.  The thing with acceptance is that we have a choice whether to accept something or not. Imagine that you’re presented with two gifts: one is wrapped nice and fancy with glittery paper, a silk bow and fine jewels. The other is wrapped in a crumpled up, raggedy looking bag with grease stains and wrinkles. Which are you most likely to accept? Probably the fancy looking gift. 

But what if the gift wrapped in a raggedy bag is the exact thing you’ve been waiting for? What if it’s the thing that you’ve prayed for, something that can change your life completely? 

The problem we have is that we don’t want to accept gifts from God that are wrapped in trash. Sometimes He’ll give us exactly what we need, but we don’t recognize its value because it may be wrapped in rejection, disappointment, hurt feelings, sorrow, grief, turmoil, depression, death, divorce, disease, job loss, friend loss, relationship loss, storms, and rain. God’s gifts aren’t always pretty.

I got engaged in August 2018. My wedding was scheduled for August 2019. A few months prior to the wedding, the relationship dissolved.  After months of prayer, professional counseling, and reflection, I saw that him leaving was the best thing that could’ve happened. Not because he’s a bad person, but because God has better in store for me. 

Let’s be very clear: it hurt like heck to email and call family and friends just a few months prior to my wedding to tell them it was cancelled. It hurt to cancel vendors, to walk past all the decorations I’d hand crafted, to look at the fabric for my gown laying in my mother’s shop. It HURT. On the day I returned his wedding band, I sat in the car and wondered, “Am I supposed to be sad right now?” I literally didn’t know how to feel. Then the Holy Spirit spoke and said, “Say thank you.”

So I started to thank God. Then I thought to myself, Lord, how can I say thank you for a gift that feels like complete trash? How can I be grateful for something that’s wrapped in garbage? What do I say to this? It hurts to do this! It doesn’t even make sense! I’m left with no explanation, no apology, no closure, NOTHING! This is trash!

 I imagine that’s how Jesus felt in the garden of Gethsemene. Lord, look. This hurts, this is trash, I don’t want to do this. I don’t want to willingly die for some folks who don’t even like me! I know we talked about it and all, but DUDE! It’s too much! But...not my will, yours be done.

How do we respond when we’re presented with a situation that doesn’t look, sound or feel anything like what we expected or hoped for? We open our mouth, and say thank you. Lord, not my will, but yours be done. 

I’d gotten to a point where I said, “Lord, if it doesn’t bring you glory, I don’t want it. If it’s not in your will, take it away. If you’re not there, I won’t show up either. Forget the dress, forget the flowers, forget it ALL if it doesn’t bring you glory.” And He took it away. Your will not mine. Your plans not mine. 

When Jesus was born, it had been prophesied that a messiah was coming to the earth. A great and mighty king who would save the world. When he got here, he didn’t look powerful and mighty...he was an itty bitty baby, wrapped in scraps, lying in a manger. But did his raggedy wrappings make him any less divine? Nope. Because the wise men knew the deal. They knew his worth, so they bowed before him. 

Years later, during Passover, the people heard that Jesus was coming to Jerusalem. They were excited to see their king! They probably expected him to enter town on a strapping stallion with gold and purple robes... because he was a king. They weren’t expecting to see him ride in on a donkey. A stolen, funky donkey. Wearing  brown “man” sandals. But did that make him less of a king?

When he told the disciples that he would soon be crucified, that he would have to die in order for them to live, they didn’t even believe him. They refused to accept that in order to have eternal life, their leader, their shepherd, their friend would have to sacrifice his. But his sacrifice, the greatest gift known to mankind, was wrapped in death.

What do you do when the best thing that God has for you is wrapped in the death of something, or loneliness, heartbreak, broken relationships? What do we do when the gift isn’t pretty?

We must learn to accept the fact that when God is in it...it’s automatically good.  We ask for the courage to let go when God says no, and to rest assured that when He says yes, it’s His absolute best. Period. 

God has said no to a lot of things in my life. Many plans I made and thought were great, God had to dismantle for my ultimate good. I could’ve wallowed in sorrow, been depressed, committed suicide, quit everything and just gave up. There were nights I wailed to God because the pain was so great. There was a moment when I was so low, I realized this is where suicidal thoughts come from- loss, grief, rejection. This is how depression sneaks in. I literally almost gave up on everything that I was assigned to...

But God gave me the courage and the strength to accept His purpose over my plans. To accept His will. To see that there was a gift in this. The gift of peace knowing that I’m still walking out my purpose and HE gets the glory. And in the few months that I should’ve been down, out, and depressed, I found a home of my own, a great job, and was led to a church that’s just for me...all because I accepted God’s purpose over my plan. 

Acceptance comes when we fully understand that what was, is not what is and move forward in whatever direction God calls us.

Every good and perfect gift comes from the Lord. Sometimes God’s perfect gifts don’t come wrapped in pristine, shiny, glittery paper. Sometimes His gifts are delivered to us wrapped in trash and scraps - sadness, depression, rejection, loss, defeat, divorce, death, pain. Your greatest treasure might be hidden behind what looks like turmoil. Your purpose could be wrapped in a painful situation. I pray that God gives us a reality check...that we take full ownership of the gift He’s given us... however it’s wrapped.